The program my wife Cindy and I coach for is all surrounded around habits. Habits are around 50% of what we do everyday. Driving is a habit, what we shop for at the grocery story is a habit, and how we respond to situations in life is a habit. Much of these habits stick around in our lives (whether they are good or bad) because of how we view ourselves. The quality of our lives many times depends on the quality of our habits.
What I have been learning and teaching about recently is about Identity-Based Habits.
Identity based habits focus on who you would like to become.
Health wises, I want to be about 175lbs, healthy and active. I want to be someone who is active daily in some way (walks, biking, hikes, exercise etc.). I want to be the guy who doesn’t have an addiction to sugar and carbs. I don’t want to have to make a conscious decision about making the right decision as to what I eat. I just want how I live and eat (what I just mentioned) to be automatic. I want it to be a habit and just who I am. So when I am tempted by things that don’t serve me, I won’t be tempted because that is just who I am.
So am I there yet, nope. But I am getting there.
With identity based habits this is where you start. You determine who you want to be first and then you build the systems in your life to lead to that outcome.
This just doesn’t apply to your health. Nope, this can apply to all areas of our lives. It can be in our relationships, in our careers, in our marriages, in our parenting…I think ya get the idea.
In the book, Atomic Habits by James Clear he gives a great illustration of someone who changes how they identify themselves.
There are two smokers that are both trying to quit smoking.
The first smoker is offered a cigarette. The smoker says, “No thank you, I am trying to quit.” This person still identifies as a smoker who is trying to be something else. They are hoping their behavior with smoking will change while still believing they are a smoker.
The second smoker is offered a cigarette. The smoker says, “No thank you, I don’t smoke.” It is a subtle difference but this person has signaled a shift in their identity. Smoking is a part of their former life, not their current life.
Most people (including me) don’t consider changing their identity before they begin to change something in their life.
Private Investigation
So let’s talk about being a private investigator or becoming a private investigation business owner. In particular I want to discuss that habits you have as an employee or as a business owner.
As a private investigation employee
As an employee I want you to ask yourself who you want to become. What type of investigator do you want to be. What do you stand for?
Here are some examples:
Systems to support how you identify above
- Letting go of my ego, I am observant and looking for opportunities to learn from people around me regardless of who they are.
- I will practice being humble and building trust with other investigators and supervisors by admitting when I have messed up.
- I take pride in a job well done and following the rules so those around me can adopt the same philosophy.
- Being truthful, even when no one is watching is how I exhibit my integrity. My reports and testimony are factual.
- I will challenge myself when I feel resistance to do something in an investigation. Is it fear? Is it something new? Why am I resistant to what is being asked of me or doing what I know I should do?
- I will always be learning, giving credit to others, celebrating others first.
- I constantly seek knowledge and work outside of my comfort zone as I know that is where my growth will come from. Being comfortable is easy. Doing things that are uncomfortable are hard.
- Through my actions, heart, teaching, praise, and philosophies I will only be of value to those around me.
As a Private Investigation Business Owner
Again, as an owner, this is a different animal but the same principals apply.
What type of owner do you want to be? What will you stand for? What type of business do you want to have?
Here is an example:
- I am the type of owner that learns from other investigators and owners. I don’t know everything and I am always open to growth.
- I am an owner that does not blame anyone else for my lack of business or my failures
- I am the type of owner that wants to develop investigators so they too can start a business and legacy of their own.
- I am they type of owner that does not get comfortable in my business
Systems to Support How You Identify With
Here are examples:
- I don’t know everything so I will learn from others in the field whether it be employees or other business owners. I will learn from other business and other business types to see how I can think outside the box and grow my business in ways others have never even thought of.
- I don’t blame my employees, the weather, the season, the economy, other companies etc. for my lack of business and business growth. I take responsibility for hiring the right investigators and training them properly.
- I invest in my employees. I provide training opportunities for growth and invest financially for my employees to receive extra training that I can not provide personally.
- I refuse to be financially comfortable. Extra money represents more investing in my employees and giving to others and organizations that need my financial help.
Some folks say, I want to be a private investigator or I want to have a private investigation business (outcome they desire). Then they take a course or get their private investigation license (process of getting there). What they don’t do is change their mindset on being flexible or change from a employee mindset to a business owner mindset (thoughts, habits). Their old identity and work mentality will sabotage them if they don’t change those things.
You want to go from the type of person that says, “I want to be this type of person” to the type of person who says, “I am this person.”
So there is a two step process in this whole identity change thing I have been talking about up to this point.
1st Step: Decide the type of person you want to be.
What do you stand for?
If you are looking for an outcome like being a business owner, ask yourself, what type of person do I need to become to be successful?
2nd Step: Prove it to yourself with small wins
What small steps can you take each day to get you to your goal?
What small things can you learn or do each day to get you closer to your goal.
Can you imagine how these small things would start to compound over time for your career or business if you did them consistently over a month, over a year or over a decade?
As you build your new habits, take pride in them. Those who take pride in those good habits will strive even harder to maintain them. Build your habits with small wins and decide who you want to become.
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